Boy Funnies

I want to bottle up and save forever their giggles, their questions, their insights, their “muscle hugs” and, well, them.

4 and 2 are the best years yet. And while I hear it keeps getting better I am savoring these days.

The days where they beg for one more story book cuddled on the couch. The days where they insist that, when they get older, they are going to marry us and we’ll be “one big happy married family.” The days that Judah picks me flowers and Wesley picks Paul flowers. The days that Wesley calls vomiting hiccuping. The days that Judah spends 4 hours listening to his Bible stories on audio book.

One of my favorite things is the delightful tidbits that come out of their creative minds. I keep tabs of them as best as possible and one day they’ll all be published in a coffee table book. {Recently created my first Collection of Funnies book and, thanks to a Groupon deal in Toronto had it made up there and picked up by my sister… so I haven’t seen the book yet but am dying to!}

Here are a select few of recent favorites:

Me, to Wesley who was holding one of my stuffed animals: “Did you know that was mine when I was a little girl?”
Wesley: “Yes, and now it’s mine now that I am a little girl.”

Me, when the boys put up a fuss about lunch: You are going to eat what mommy says you are eating. You do not get to pick and choose.
Wesley, obviously not hearing me correctly: OH! I want pickle juice!

Wesley: Wouldn’t it be so funny if mommy peed outside?
Judah, yelling: NO DON’T EVER SAY THAT! Mommy doesn’t pee on things.
Wesley: But it would be so funny!
Judah: No – never say that. It would never be funny for mommy to pee on anything.

Judah asked me to feed him his dinner and I said “No Judah you are a big boy, eat your dinner on your own.”
Seconds later Wesley says “Mommy, I am a little boy, could you feed me please?”

Wesley: Mommy, could you help me cuddle myself?

{While looking at pictures from Nigeria}
Judah: Why are all my friends black?
Paul: Because that’s how God made them.
Judah: Oh. Did he use black dirt then?
Paul: No, but do you know we all came from Adam, who was created from dirt?
Judah: So were we made from white dirt then and my friends from black dirt?

Me: Judah, can you tell me your Cubbie verse?
Judah: No, I can’t mommy. My batteries in my mouth are almost dead.

Me: Judah you are so cute I could eat you up!
Judah: But mommy you can’t! That’s illegal – that’s canna… canana…
Me: Cannibalism?
Judah: Yes, and you will go to jail for it if you do it.

Me: Judah, why is your tongue sticking out?
Judah: Because there are people inside of my mouth and the only way to let them out is for me to stick out my tongue.

Judah to Wesley: You don’t eat playdough you Runk.
Me, concerned about the name calling: What’s a Runk Judah?
Judah: You know, like a trunk only it’s runk.
Me, still trying to figure this out: And where did you hear of a ‘runk’
Judah: Oh, I just found it in my head so I thought I would say it.

Paul was explaining the progression of age and how one day Judah might be a daddy and then a grandpa and then a great grandpa.
Judah said quite seriously;”Well, I’d rather just be a great Judah. Not a great grandpa.”

Judah: “When we are dead can we talk?”
Me: “No.”
Judah: “How about when we go to heaven after we are dead, can we talk there?”
Me: “Yes.”
Judah: “Well, then I want to go to heaven. I always want to talk.”

Judah: “Listen to my joke Wesley! There once was a man who climbed up on a roof with spears and when he got on to the top he fell into a toilet and then the chimney got stuck on him.”

Judah, watching the rain: “Is that God’s spit?”

Wesley came crying to me, with Judah close on his tail.
Juday: “Wesley was about to hurt me so I just hurt him first.”

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6 Replies to “Boy Funnies

  1. Very funny! What a great idea to make a book out of the funny things they say!

    The other day my 3yo saw a pregnant lady and I was explaining that she had a baby growing in her just like he grew in me. His response "Did she have to chew the baby up to get it in there like you had to chew me up so I could get in your belly to grow?" I couldn't respond be I was laughing too hard! To him it was a logical explanation of where babies come from.

  2. Judah sounds like his daddy. When repremaded for pinching Danny as a baby, Paul replied when he get older he'll hit me so I pinched him now!

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