Some days ….
Their gifted-ness in never ending ideas matched by endless enthusiasm sometimes leaves me wishing I could be locked in a sound proof room without a key.
It is exhausting giving their ideas space in my head;
When they request a grand farewell party for our house guest shortly before the house guest departs I want to say no, that’s too much work and too much mess.
When they request that everybody-in-the-world-that-they-love-so-very-much be invited to their birthday party I want to say no, because it is humbling to not be able to afford much for so many people.
When they want to hand out icecream cones to strangers I want to say no, because frankly, it is embarrassing to love strangers in little boy language.
Basically – when they want to express love in their language, with their own unique God-given gifts, in the moments they think of it, to people they feel drawn to I want to tell them it’s too much work, too messy, too embarrassing.
Those examples I gave are ones I could easily think of because, despite wanting to say no, God has graciously worked on my heart and I said yes to those scenarios. But there are plenty of great ideas I say no to, despite my desire to be intentional and say yes.
God has been working on my heart and has given me a bigger picture to look at:: how do the quirks and characteristics and interests of my young children look when they are matured a little bit?
It’s a given that my children will mature – they won’t always be running around on all fours talking Baboon to one another – and while I know they will mature, so too will their interests and their ability to love and I want so badly to look at their immaturity now in light of what they can grow to be and to help grow their immaturity into godly strengths.
If they are currently continually asking a.never.ending.stream.of.questions and imitating new things learned, I hope it matures into a hunger for knowledge and wisdom.
If they have a great idea and ask politely to execute said idea, I hope it matures into men confident of planning and leading.
If they pull off some wild stunt that makes my heart race a little bit more than normal, I hope it matures into them being men that will stand up for what they believe in despite all risks.
If they love to build forts from my sheets and blankets, I hope it matures into them being creative with the materials the Lord provides for them later in their life.
If they beg to sit and snuggle through “just one more” story, I hope it matures to impress upon them the value of sitting and being present with a person.
If they ask, and pull together, a farewell “party” in the last few moments for a house guest, I hope it matures into them genuinely cherishing others and celebrating them.
If they consider the youngest of babes to the elderly their best of friends for birthday parties, I hope it matures into a godly love and respect for the young and old, and the ability to be friendly to all.
If they want to hand out ice cream to strangers, I hope it matures into a deep love for others, showing it in ways that they, in their uniquely created way, can only do.
Some days I don’t feel like letting little boys do little boy things. Some days I forget that, while being little boys, they are growing up and that the things they are doing right now are growing and molding them into the men they will one day be.